Imagine you have got a response from a great girl on a dating site. You have been chatting and get on well. Finally, you manage to exchange numbers and suddenly, you realize the hard work is just beginning.
Getting the number is the next step in the relationship. To ensure you get it right, read on for our must-know guide on how to start a text conversation with a girl.
Don’t Wait Too Long to Send a Message
If you have met a lady on a dating app, the chances are she has other suitors in town. Dating apps are filled with guys and very few women, meaning you need to get ahead of the pack. Luckily, most guys will fall at the first few hurdles and with a good texting technique, you can rise to the top.
Don’t message as soon as her number arrives in your inbox. On the flip side, you also don’t want to keep her waiting too long. Aim to message her within the first 24 hours of getting the number. Open with a simple “hello”, telling them your name and that you were speaking with them on the dating app.
Make an Introduction
You should get a message back acknowledging receipt of the message. Now is the time to start a conversation. Start it as soon as they message back, as you have a good indication that they are free to chat for a few minutes at least.
Start by introducing yourself, but in a very informal way. Tell them what you are up to, but make sure it is something that describes your personality. You may tell them you finished work, activity or sport.
End the first message by asking a question. This gives them something to follow on with. Make sure it is something that takes the focus off you and places the attention firmly on them. This message should be short and snappy, and not a long essay.
Carry On Where You Left Off
If you have already been talking to a girl on a dating site and had a lengthy conversation, you can ignore the steps before. In fact, it makes more sense if you introduce yourself and carry on the conversation you were having on the site.
What you want to avoid is a total change in how you message and your implied intention. If your talk is caring, compassionate and suddenly jumps to language indicating you just want a hook-up, the person will run a mile. Imagine you are still talking on the dating site when texting.
Use Gifs and Emojis
You can tell a lot about a person from the gifs they choose. In fact, while many people can shy away from using gifs, a well-placed one can be extremely funny. Choose them wisely, to enhance a conversation you are already having and imply the meaning between the lines.
Emojis are also a great way to convey emotion over text, without having to write it out. They break up the text, which can be off-putting to read if provided in large chunks. However, you must be wary of the emojis you do use, as some can have double meanings and too many wink faces may come off as a little sleazy.
Make the Conversation Two Way
Now you have the conversation going, you have to make it a two-way process. You want to find out more about them, but you don’t want it to be a constant barrage of questions. The way to get around this is to ask them questions but tell them a little bit about yourself in the process.
If done correctly, and if they are interested, they should return with their own questions. They may want you to elaborate on previous comments or responses.
What have you got planned for the weekend? I am out for some food with friends Sunday, but they always take me to bad pizza joints and order bad stuff. I just want a big fat burger!
This is a great example. You are asking them a question. This is then followed by enough information about yourself for them to start asking questions.
Where are you going? What do you consider bad food? What is your favorite burger?
If they don’t message back, or only answer the question, then they are playing hard to get. If they are not giving much away, they just might not be that into it and it may be worth going elsewhere.
Time Your Texts
A great way to end your first conversation or any subsequent ones is to time your texts. A simple goodnight or good morning can go a long way and lets them know you are thinking of them without being too full on. You can also do this with calendar dates, wishing them happy holidays or even asking what they plan to do with long weekends (which can be strung into a date invitation).
If the conversation starts to fade out, then don’t be afraid to make a quick change. In fact, a leftfield topic change can be as good as starting again. It could be something as simple as discussing something that happened to you, or about a television show or game you are watching.
Know When to Stop
Sometimes, even when you have a number, it does not work out. Knowing when to stop can be hard, but it prevents you from wasting your time and effort.
Taking a long time to respond is a good indicator they may not be that interested. However, they could genuinely be busy. One-word answers or semi occasional responses are also signs it may not be happening.
In this instance, it is best to let it go. If they are interested, then they will text back at some point. If they ask you to stop texting, then do so, as this could be considered harassment.
Arrange a Date!
Finally, arrange a date. If the conversation has gone well but starts to dry up, or even if the person seems to be losing interest, arrange a date. The answer will either be a yes, a no, or no reply (also a no) but in all instances, you have nothing to lose.
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